It's been a while, but hey creativity goes by it's own rules

What's up, everybody? Welcome to the episode of the PW podcast. I'm your host as always Peter Witham. You can find myself and this podcast at peterwitham.com. It's been a while, hasn't it?

It's been actually a very long while since the last episode. And part of the reason for that is I really wasn't sure that I felt like I had anything to contribute that was really beneficial to any of you as the listeners. And So I took a step back and thought I don't know should I should I carry on doing this is anything I'm saying really resonating or having value and I'm sure we all go through this right, you know, especially if you're a creative person every so often you question whether the work that you're doing is either sending the right message or, you know, is hitting home where you want it to go and to be completely blunt the amount of people that listen to this podcast it was telling me I'm really just not either getting the audience or finding the right people for the topics that I'm talking about. I I guess it's the way to put this. And then on the flip side, you you think well, you've always got opinions Peter.

So why are you not sharing them on the podcast? And it's difficult and so I felt it was time to to go back and revisit this and That's where we're at here. I This is such a passion project for me. This podcast has actually existed I think, for about 7 years now, believe it or not. You wouldn't know it from the episodes because like I've said before, I've been through a couple of different hosts way back when anchor.fm was a thing was when I started this and so it's actually been going a very long time and I don't know that I've ever found the path that resonates with folks.

But I I also stubbornly stubborn English guy, right, flatly refused to just give up on something as well. So here we are. Here here's another episode for you. In this one, it's kind of, catching up on some thoughts. Right?

I've I've been struggling with projects lately because I have, like many of us so many projects, right? But normally you have 1 or 2 that's like your standout really want to work on this project now kind of thing and the problem I've had is that I've actually got I think about 3 or 4 of those at this point And so I've locked myself into this pattern of going nowhere on any of them because it's that deer in the headlights thing of I would sit down at my machine after I done the day job and it's in the evening and I'm like, right, let's do something and then decision lock of which one do I work on and and then I realized, yeah, I don't know was the answer and so of course you you end up not working on any of them. That that's what happens to me anyway. But the ones that I'm going with at the moment, frankly, are the ones that just make me happy and they get me excited to work on them and also learn a lots of things at the same time. If you've been keeping up with some of my other podcasts, you'll know that I've been learning the 3 d modeling software Blender to improve some one of my games and to work on some other things and this was great because I have not done 3 d modeling in at least oh my gosh, 20 years, I guess.

Back in the day, it was Maya and Autodesk, 3 d Studio 3 d Studio Max. Those were the tools that I used. That's how long ago it was and so it was an opportunity to come back to something that I had basically remembered absolutely nothing on and Yeah, it's painful because the progress is very slow at first, but the enjoyment of learning something completely new unrelated to the other projects that I'm working on actually provides a very interesting level of motivation and that for me, I realized is what it's about. I'm motivated because I don't know where it's going. I don't necessarily know what the end goal is.

I know the end goal is that I need some 3 d models and some assets and so on for some other things, but I've left it open ended as to how long that takes and how I get there and That is such a great removal of stress. I can't even tell you compared to things like, oh, I gotta do the update for this project and it's mundane and it's boring, but I gotta do the update. Google is bugging me to verify my account and everything else and that's boring, but I got to do it because it's key to everything and and all those kind of things. I guess what I'm saying to you here is sometimes you just got to do the thing that interests you and say to hell with why I'm doing it other than I'm just interested to do it and because I want to and sometimes that's what you got to do. I think right You know, put it put aside the projects that you've told yourself, convinced yourself are the important ones for whatever reason and to say, I'm just doing this for the hell of it and if it completely fouls or I get bored with it and walk away one day, So be it doesn't matter, right?

And I think that you've got to have some times and some work like that To give yourself the freedom to just say it doesn't matter You've heard me say this in episodes before not everything has to necessarily have an end goal Sometimes it's about the journey, right? So you go learn a bunch of things 3 d modeling and you have a lot of fun doing it and you get pretty fast results for some things and it's pretty rewarding and then you struggle on some others because you don't know why the hell it's not working. But that in itself is interesting to me and because there's no stress there to get it done if I completely fail to understand it, fine. I'll walk away. Come back tomorrow.

Come back next week. Doesn't matter. Along with that, I'm doing a lot of this in public on my live streams, which if you're interested twitch.tvforward/compiledev, one word. Now the interesting thing there is doing all this stuff in public is, yeah, it goes wrong a lot of the time, but as long as you say to yourself, it doesn't matter. It's fine.

I'm not making people watch this peep I'm not making people pay for it and so hey, if you want to watch me struggle go for it. If you want to celebrate the wins with me go for it, but it really doesn't matter. I'm just putting it out there because I want to and so that's some of the stuff that I've been working on and I just wanted to put this out there as something for you all because like I say it had been way too long and I thought I need to get back on the bandwagon with this podcast and put it out there because this is my podcast where I just share thoughts with no specific bias towards any particular one of my skill sets or any one particular topic or projects or anything like that. It's not my programming one. It's not my game development one.

It's just my creative thoughts and so I wanted to put this out there. If this has been helpful, let me know folks. Seriously, to all of you in the past who have reached out and said, hey, keep going with this. It's cool. I like it.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you so much because it makes the world of difference knowing that even if I'm just talking to 1 person, which is how I think about this while I'm recording. I'm talking to 1 person The great I'll keep doing this for you.

That's no problem I got endless amounts of thoughts and opinions on things So let me know, right? Go to peterwithamam.com/contact and just let me know. And on the flip side, if you feel like no dude, you're totally doing this one wrong. Please, please tell me that too because I I wanna hear that. I need to know if I'm hitting the right direction or maybe my my call was right and I should have just abandoned this one altogether.

Let me know because you're the ones that matter on this. Alright? I can talk into this microphone for the end of the time, but it doesn't mean it's useful to anybody and that's what I care about. That's it folks. Speak to you in the next one.